


Two Years Later

by usopping



Category: One Piece
Genre: Angst, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-12-03
Updated: 2016-08-07
Packaged: 2018-02-28 01:03:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,692
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2713238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/usopping/pseuds/usopping
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Two years ago Zoro confessed his feelings for Sanji. Now the Straw Hats are back together to continue their journey and Zoro confronts him once more.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Confrontation

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted on tumblr and ff.net, I've scrapped parts of the story as I had written it and am posting a revised version here.

Zoro stepped into the galley and closed the door behind him. "You got a minute?"

From his place at the sink, Sanji glanced towards the other. "Sure."

Zoro took a seat at the breakfast bar, keeping his eye trained on the cook's back. "It's been two years."

"And?" Sanji asked.

"My feelings haven't changed."

Sanji nearly dropped the plate he'd been rinsing. Then he sighed. "Why are you telling me this?"

It had been upon their departure from Thriller Bark that Zoro had asked to speak to him alone. Still covered in bandages and moving stiffly, he had looked Sanji in the eye and confessed that he had feelings for him. Of course, Sanji had vehemently rejected the other man, telling him it was probably just frustration anyway, from being on the ship so long, and adding an order to stay the hell away from him, just for good measure. Zoro had seemingly taken it all in stride and hadn't acted any different afterwards, probably because he had seen the reaction coming.

"Figured you should know," Zoro said now.

Sanji glanced over his shoulder and resumed his work, a little more aggressively than necessary. In a grating voice, he said, "My feelings haven't changed either. I'm not interested in men."

The glass in his hand shattered, a large shard embedding itself in the fleshy part of his palm. "Goddammit!"

Zoro watched with mild amusement as Sanji pulled out the shard. As he turned to stick the cut under the tap, Zoro rose and rummaged through drawers until he found a roll of bandages. He waited for Sanji to dry his hands and arms before taking the wounded hand and wrapping it, ignoring Sanji's protests.

"I told you, I'm not –"

"I get it," Zoro interrupted. He finished wrapping the wound and promptly dropped Sanji's hand. Then he turned and started picking glass out of the sink. "I'm not coming on to you. Just letting you know."

His calmness irritated Sanji. He was sure Zoro had known how he would react to such a confession two years ago. Even the idiot swordsman couldn't be stupid enough to think Sanji was even remotely interested in other guys. Why had he bothered saying anything in the first place? And to bring it up again almost immediately after regrouping? What was his problem?

Sanji bumped Zoro away from the sink with a hip and mumbled, "I'll do that."

Zoro shrugged and trashed the glass he'd already picked up, then sat back down. "Are you mad?"

_ Obviously. _ "No."

"Are you threatened?"

"What the hell is _that_ supposed to mean?"

"So you are threatened."

"No, I'm not, especially not by you, ya damn _marimo_ -head!"

Zoro's lips twitched into a smirk. "It's not like I'm gonna force myself on you."

"Whatever." Sanji finished cleaning up the glass and went back to washing dishes. The silence stretched on between the two men. Zoro saw that Sanji was tense, almost on guard, and decided to leave him alone. He'd just stood up when the cook spoke again.

"I'm not mad or threatened, but you can't just come up to a guy outta the blue and say something like that. And then bring it up again after all this time. It – I dunno, it freaked me out back then."

Zoro paused. "And now?"

"I don't understand why you have to bring it up," Sanji muttered.

"Well, that's your problem," Zoro said with a shrug. He made for the door again.

"Wait. It – it's not like I hate you or anything, but I just – I can't – I'm not …" Sanji sighed in exasperation. "Forget it. I don't know what I'm saying."

"Missed you, too," Zoro said and exited the galley.

Sanji stood frozen at the sink, his hand still throbbing – and his skin still tingling from Zoro's touch. That time after Thriller Bark, he'd reacted out of shock and fear, already on edge from finding Zoro standing in a pool of blood, drenched in it, and from hearing the truth of what happened from two of the Rolling Pirates who had seen it first-hand. He couldn't explain away the worry and panic he'd felt, nor the fear he'd had that Zoro wouldn't wake up. When he had indeed woken up only to confess romantic feelings for Sanji, it had been instinct with an edge of anxiety to reject him. Yet over the past two years, his mind kept going back to the exchange, even as he was chased day and night by _okamas_. Zoro had held his gaze and stated his feelings almost matter-of-factly, without a hint of shame. It wasn't just that he had seen the reaction coming, Sanji realized, it was that he saw it coming and told him anyway.

"Don't tell me it's some out-of-respect bullshit," Sanji said quietly.

This time around the admission had come as less of a surprise. After all, what else would Zoro want to talk to him about alone? Some part of Sanji had hoped, in those moments that it took Zoro to cross the galley and take a seat, that he'd come to announce that Sanji had been right, that he was over his little crush. But even at Thriller Bark Sanji hadn't really believed that the confession was driven by some kind of sexual frustration. Zoro wasn't one to waste words, especially over something so trivial.

Trying to shake thoughts of the idiot swordsman out of his head, Sanji finished up the dishes and moved on to cleaning the rest of the kitchen. It didn't take long for his thoughts to drift right back to the situation at hand.

"I'm not interested in men," he'd said. And then the glass had shattered and his heart had raced as Zoro bandaged the wound. It was as though his very being protested the statement.

"But it's the truth," Sanji muttered to himself.

It took him longer than usual to clean the kitchen. When he finally stepped out onto the deck, night had already fallen. He paused to light a cigarette and surveyed the deck. Everyone seemed to have retired to their respective quarters, except Franky, who was lowering the anchors, and, to Sanji's annoyance, Zoro. The swordsman was leaning against the railing to Sanji's left, staring out at the sea. Franky finished lowering the anchors and headed inside, offering Sanji some greeting to which Sanji replied vaguely, his attention on Zoro.

"Oi, cook," Zoro said suddenly. "What're you starin' at?"

Sanji started and felt himself go red. He took a drag, blew out a stream of smoke, and replied, "Nothing."

"Then get lost. I'm first watch, not you." There was an edge to his voice that surprised Sanji, and made him decide he was definitely not going inside yet.

"I'm not tired," he said and made his way to lean on the railing next to Zoro, back to the ocean.

"I thought you wanted me to leave you alone," Zoro said.

"I didn't say that."

"Yes you did."

"Two years ago."

"Thought your feelings hadn't changed."

Sanji rolled his eyes but didn't reply. For several moments, the two stood there in silence. Then Zoro glanced over at Sanji and said, "You really did miss me, didn't you."

"Yeah, well, when you're in hell you start to miss even idiot _marimos_."

"Shut up, curly-brow."

Sanji smirked. "Good to know you haven't changed."

"Is it?" Zoro asked, serious again. He watched as Sanji sucked on his cigarette and seemed to think about it. Just as Zoro was about to tell him to forget it, the cook spoke.

"It is, in a way," he said. With a laugh he went on, "I think I woulda been a bit disappointed if you'd come and said you're over me."

Zoro made a disbelieving noise, which Sanji ignored. He ground out his cigarette and turned to the other. "Kiss me."

Zoro went red. " _Why?_ "

Not the response Sanji had expected. He stuttered, "You – you don't ask someone _why_ when they tell you to kiss them!"

"You don't tell someone to kiss you when you've already rejected them!" Zoro ran a hand irritably through his hair. "Just go to bed, dumbass."

But when he started to walk away, Sanji grabbed his hand. "Zoro, wait."

Zoro waited.

"I … don't know what I'm feeling," Sanji admitted.

"Maybe you're frustrated," Zoro said dryly.

"Heh. Maybe. Maybe not."

"And you think kissing me is gonna help you figure it out?"

"Maybe."

The swordsman sighed and yanked his hand out of Sanji's grip. Then he turned around and was right in front of the other man in two steps. Without giving himself a moment to hesitate, he tilted the cook's head up and kissed him softly, lingering on his lips for mere seconds. When he pulled away, Sanji's face was pink and he looked almost shocked.

"You're blushing," Zoro said.

Sanji snapped back to normal. "Shut up! So are you!"

"No I'm not."

"Yes you are!"

Zoro shoved at him. "You're so annoying!"

As he stumbled backwards, Sanji grabbed Zoro's robe and used it to pull himself close again. "You love it," he murmured and kissed the swordsman. This time when they parted it was only for half a heartbeat, and when their lips collided again, there was a hunger in them both. Slowly, they sank to the deck where they were soon tangled together. Zoro's mind was going a mile a minute, trying to figure out what the hell the cook was thinking. Could it be that he felt the same way as Zoro and had simply been in denial all this time? Or was he just using Zoro to experiment? Was this all a joke? At the same time, Zoro focused desperately on not moving his hands. Though they wanted nothing more than to roam the contours of Sanji's body, he kept them firmly wrapped around the man's waist. Anything more would probably freak him out, after all…

He was pulled out of his thoughts when Sanji broke the kiss, sitting up to straddle him. "What's wrong? Not enjoying this?"

Zoro swiped a sleeve over his mouth, an action that made Sanji frown. "Why are you…? I mean, you should probably figure out what you feel _before_ you start kissing a person."

"I don't see you complaining," Sanji said, smirking and slowly starting to lean back towards Zoro.

Zoro grabbed him by the tie and pulled him roughly down the rest of the way, kissing him hard. He held Sanji tight and flipped their positions. Sanji gripped Zoro's shoulders and let out a sigh that only encouraged the other. He pressed his hips against Sanji's before he realized it'd now be impossible to deny the extent of his longing. But when the cook bent his knees and pressed his thighs to Zoro's sides as if to hold him closer, it became apparent that Zoro wasn't the only excited one.

He pulled away for a moment and simply looked down at Sanji. "Am I dreaming?"

Sanji snorted and looked away. "Don't say stuff like that, it's not like you."

"Are you gonna hate me in the morning?"

"Idiot. Of course not."

Zoro didn't voice the third question that had come into his mind – _Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?_ – and allowed Sanji to pull his head back down to continue kissing. After that, there were no more words. The only sounds were the rustles of clothing, the occasional smack of their lips, and the gentle lapping of waves against Sunny's hull. It was Sanji whose hands started to roam first, feeling Zoro's shoulders and arms, his chest and back. His hands found their way into the other's robe and circled around to clutch his back. Zoro's heart threatened to burst out of his ribcage as Sanji's touch trialed electricity over his skin. At last he had to break away to gasp for air, and when he did, Sanji moved to kiss his neck, his collarbone, his shoulders. He tried not to make a sound as the cook slowly and deliberately clawed down his back, but he knew he was red in the face, knew Sanji could tell exactly how much he was enjoying it. When the cook kissed his way back up Zoro's neck and over his jaw only to hover just half an inch from his lips, Zoro opened his eye.

Sanji was smirking.

And it was then that Zoro let his hands do as they wanted. He placed one on either side of Sanji's face and kissed him almost excruciatingly slowly, pleased when he felt the other tremble. He rolled them over again and deepened the kiss, tangling one hand into Sanji's hair while the other clutched at his back, his shoulder, his neck, and even brushed cautiously over his ass – at which point Sanji made a noise that Zoro took to mean that was off-limits. So he contented himself with slipping his hand underneath Sanji's shirt, which had come un-tucked long ago. He considered doing the same thing Sanji had done to him, but opted to trail his fingers lightly down the other's back instead. The shiver that ran through Sanji's body when he did let him know he'd made the right choice. He smirked into their kiss and repeated the action. This time Sanji jerked away to let out a gasp as he shivered again, his eyes closed, but the enjoyment plain on his face. Since Sanji had created a small gap between them Zoro slid his hand around his side and up his chest to give Sanji's nipple a pinch.

At that, Sanji sat up rapidly and stared down at Zoro, breathing hard. Zoro couldn't pin an emotion to the look on the cook's face, but something told him the fun was over. And no sooner had the thought crossed his mind than Sanji rolled off him to lie spread-eagled on the deck. He stared at the sky, not really seeing it, and tried to calm his breathing, tried to stop his trembling. He was very aware of Zoro next to him, could feel the heat from his body, a sharp contrast to what had become a chilly night. Once he had caught his breath, he lit a cigarette. Then, almost apologetically, he shifted closer to the swordsman. After a beat, Zoro did the same. They lay there, not quite touching, both not looking at the other. When Sanji finished his smoke, Zoro said, "You should go. Second watch'll be coming up soon."

"I'm second watch," Sanji said, lighting a second cigarette.

A pause.

"Mind if I stick around?"

"Do what you want."

Zoro gritted his teeth and considered heading to bed. Whatever had happened was probably just a one-time thing after all. But then he noticed Sanji slide his hand closer. Zoro held his breath and did the same, looping his pinky over Sanji's. The cook made no move to pull away. All he did was blow out a stream of smoke and mumble, "You sure are something, _marimo_."


	2. Silence

When Zoro woke up he was lying on his stomach on the deck with his face pressed into a bundle of fabric that smelled of tobacco and spices. He pushed himself up to sit and stretch, feeling something slide off his back as he did – a blanket. The thing that had been under his head was Sanji's jacket. He folded the blanket and left it on the deck, smoothed out the jacket, and got to his feet. For a moment it seemed as though he was the only one awake, but then he noticed the tell-tale trail of smoke rising from the figurehead. He climbed up and found Sanji sitting there next to an overflowing ashtray. The cook's shirt was still un-tucked, sleeves pushed haphazardly up his forearms, the top two buttons undone, and his tie loose. His hair was ruffled, and the dark circles under his eyes made him look like he'd been awake for a week rather than just one night.

"Morning. Brought your jacket," Zoro said, tossing the garment over.

Sanji caught it and draped it across his lap. "Morning," he echoed dully, eyes glued to the horizon. Dawn had only just broken. His watch duties weren't yet over. And he wasn't sure he could look at Zoro and stay calm.

"If you wanna get some rest, I can take over," the swordsman offered.

"You implying I can't even handle one sleepless night?" Sanji snapped.

"You look tired."

"And whose fault is that?"

"Not mine."

"Entirely yours!"

"I don't remember being the one saying 'Kiss me'."

That shut Sanji up. He grunted and stubbed out the remains of his cigarette, lighting another one immediately. The truth was that he was totally wired and couldn't have slept even if he'd wanted to. Long after Zoro had fallen asleep on the deck, Sanji had lain there staring at the sky, his pinky still wrapped in Zoro's. By the time he'd snapped out of jumbled thoughts and realized he was supposed to be on look-out, Zoro had rolled onto his side, away from Sanji. Sanji had risen, found a blanket to drape over Zoro, and then hastily shed his jacket and balled it up into a makeshift pillow, all the while trying not to think about how  _girlfriendy_  his actions were. Then he'd climbed onto the figurehead and the jumbled thoughts had taken over again.

"Well, if you're not gonna sleep, I will," Zoro said, sensing the cook's desire to be alone, or maybe just to not be with him. "Later."

Sanji barely noticed him leave. It certainly did nothing to calm his mind. Internally, he was freaking out. The thoughts ran through his head in overlapping circles, like a bunch of broken records playing at once with the volume on full blast.  _Did that really happen? That happened. That actually happened. I made out with the goddamn_ marimo _. I made out with him and touched him and he touched me._  And then there was the one quiet, almost taunting thought that Sanji refused to acknowledge:  _And you liked it, didn't you?_

* * *

 

In the men's quarters, Zoro got into bed but suddenly found himself wide awake. Disappointment crept through him like poisonous gas, slow, steady, and toxic. He wasn't sure what he'd expected this morning to be like, but he hadn't expected  _this_. The best case scenario, which Zoro had actually let himself hope for as he'd lain on the deck falling asleep, would have been Sanji deciding he felt for Zoro after all. The worst case scenario, which Zoro had told himself to expect, would have been another loud and probably violent rejection.

He'd never anticipated silence.

Sighing heavily and rolling onto his side, Zoro wondered what the hell the cook had been thinking. What had possessed him to tell Zoro to kiss him? He wasn't the type to experiment. Zoro had been sure that even if the cook had felt some faint desire to be with another man, he would sooner repress it than act on it. Which was probably why Zoro had been so caught off guard last night that he'd actually obliged.

No, that was a lie. His decision to kiss Sanji had nothing to do with being caught off-guard and everything to do with his own desire, his longing to know what it felt like having those lips pressed against his, if only for a moment. That one moment had turned into much longer was even more surprising than the initial demand, but by then Zoro was long gone, too captivated to stop.

Stupid cook.

Oh well. What was done was done, and moping wouldn't change anything. It would be best to just forget the whole thing. Surely that was what the cook was doing. Zoro had lived with these feelings for more than two years; it wasn't as if they'd kill him. Forgetting what the cook felt like against him, under him, would be the hard part, especially with a tiny voice in the back of his mind whispering,  _Maybe he just needs time_ ….

Zoro didn't realize how long he'd been lost in thought until Brook started playing an obnoxious tune on violin, crying, "Good morning, everyone! Time to get up! Breakfast is served!"

Groans, yawns, and rustling filled the room as the crew began to wake up and get out of bed. Brook ran out of the room with a "Yohohoho!" and Franky disappeared soon after to do a quick check of Sunny's fuel tanks before breakfast. Usopp clambered out of his bed and said, "Oi, Zoro, get up before Brook comes back for round two. You, too, Luffy!" he added, reaching into Luffy's bunk trying to shake the captain awake.

Stretching and faking a yawn, Zoro grumbled, "Yeah, yeah."

The scent of the meal that awaited them began to drift into the room through the door left open by Franky. In two second flat, Luffy was bolting out the door with Usopp and Chopper hot on his heels. Brook was still running around somewhere outside and silence fell just as fast as it had been broken. Zoro sat up and swung his legs out of bed, but his limbs didn't seem to want to move any farther. Going to the galley meant facing the cook, and that was the last thing Zoro wanted to do. Aside from his cold behaviour, there was the way he had looked sitting there on the figurehead. Zoro rarely saw him looking anything less than immaculate. Even after a fight, when he was rough around the edges, there was a certain composure, probably what the cook would call class. Seeing him all worn out and dishevelled was somehow sexy.

How twisted was that?

Just then, Brook stuck his head into the room and sang, "Zoro-san! Breakfast!"

Screw it. He wasn't going to hide from the idiot cook, and it wasn't as if anything would be said or done in front of the others, not by him and definitely not by the cook. Besides, Zoro knew he'd catch hell for skipping a meal whether the guy was pissed off or not.

"I'm coming," Zoro said and followed the skeleton to the galley.

* * *

 

_"I need to talk to you."_

_"I'm busy."_

_"It's important."_

_"So talk." Dinner wasn't going to prepare itself, and Sanji wasn't particularly interested in the marimo's chit-chat. Though he no longer had to cook for the Rolling Pirates, the crew having left them behind on Thriller Bark, feeding Luffy was no simple task in and of itself. Timing was important. Miss a beat and the whole meal could end up a train wreck._

_"Cook," Zoro said._

_"Spit it out already," Sanji said irritably. "If this is about the Kuma thing –"_

_"Sanji, look at me."_

_Hearing the swordsman say his name sent an odd shiver down Sanji's spine. He looked up._

_"It's not about Kuma. It's –"_

Sanji jerked awake from the dream-memory in a cold sweat. A shudder ran through him as he blinked away the lingering image of the bandaged swordsman standing in the galley in the afternoon light, about to confess something Sanji never saw coming.

"Hey, are you okay?" Usopp asked. He was the one who had shaken Sanji awake. "You don't look so good."

"I'm fine."

"Are you sure? I mean, we can make our own lunch if you wanna keep sleeping..."

_Oh, hell no._  "Don't be stupid. It's nothing. Just a bad dream." Sanji got out of bed and started rummaging around for a clean shirt. "Thanks for waking me."

"Y-Yeah ... no problem," Usopp said and headed out of the room, a bit confused. It was shaping up to be a strange day. At breakfast Sanji had been so tired that he hadn't even been able to offer Nami and Robin more than a weak smile as he served them. Meanwhile Zoro had been polite to the cook, actually saying 'thank you' when he was handed his food, albeit rather coldly. And when everyone had eaten Zoro had all but barricaded himself in the gym while Sanji had told Usopp to wake him an hour before lunchtime before disappearing into the men's quarters.

Standing on deck now, Usopp could see that Zoro was still in the gym, swinging around one of those gigantic weights of his. Usually the swordsman left training for the afternoon, but he'd been up there all morning, constantly in movement.  _Maybe I'm just reading too far into things_ , Usopp thought. Even Sanji could get tired, and it wasn't like Zoro  _had_  to train in the afternoon every day. Still, the tension in the galley had been palpable from the moment Zoro stepped in that morning. Usopp had a feeling something had happened between those two. They may not have been best friends before, but neither had there been this much animosity between them. Something had to have happened.

* * *

 

When the rest of the crew had eaten lunch but the musclehead  _marimo_  had yet to make an appearance, Sanji handed Usopp the last plate of food and told him to take it to the swordsman and tell him that if he tried to skip another meal Sanji would kick his ass.

Zoro was putting away his weights and toweling himself off when Usopp arrived. He grabbed the plate with a mumbled 'thanks' and started shoveling food into his mouth, something like relief plain in his eye.

"Sanji's gonna kill you if you miss dinner," Usopp said.

"He can try," Zoro said between mouthfuls.

Usopp hesitated. "Is, uh, everything okay with you two?"

Zoro handed him the already-empty plate and turned away. "Yup."

_There's a 'no' if I ever heard one._  "Well, alright. If you say so." He started to walk away.

"Why, did he say something?"

Usopp paused. "No. Maybe I'm just imagining things."

Zoro waited for the sniper to leave before dropping to the floor. He'd been planning to meditate after lunch, but he knew it wouldn't be possible anymore, not after that exchange. Even though he knew exercise right after eating was a bad idea, he began to do push-ups. Usopp had already noticed something was off and it hadn't even been one day. How long until everyone – with the possible exceptions of Luffy and Chopper – caught on? If the cook didn't hate him now, he would then.

_Stop_ , he told himself.  _Focus only on what you're doing_.

Something like this shouldn't be able to distract him. What was all his training for over the past two years if he could be thrown off so easily? Yet he'd spent the morning working himself to the bone, making sure he had not a second to think about anything except his movements. And it looked like he'd have to spend the afternoon the same way.


	3. Talking

This island looks boring," Luffy complained.

"We're just here for provisions, not adventure" Nami said sharply.

"Boooooring," Luffy drawled.

The navigator ignored him. "Who else is coming?"

"Me! Me!" Chopper exclaimed, jumping up and down with one arm raised.

"We need to stock up on cola, so I'll come along," Franky said.

"I'll help," Usopp offered.

"I'll stay here," Robin said with a smile.

"I'd like to have a look around town," said Brook.

There was a beat of silence.

"Sanji- _kun_?"

"Y-Yes, Nami- _san_ , of course I'll accompany you!" Sanji said.

Zoro was nowhere to be seen, but Nami shrugged it off. "Alright, we'll leave the Sunny to you, Robin. Let's go!"

The seven of them took off. Robin watched them until they disappeared over a hill. Then she headed for her flower garden. She was surprised to find Zoro sleeping – or rather, pretending to sleep – on the deck among the flowerbeds. She had assumed he'd be in the gym, where he'd spent almost every waking minute for the past four days, and she wasn't displeased to find him taking a break. For some time she went about tending her flowers, snipping away dead leaves and wilted buds. Then, after she had filled the watering can and started watering, she spoke.

"Zoro, is everything alright?"

"You seem agitated."

A sigh. "It's nothing."

"Does it have to do with Sanji?"

Zoro opened his eye and stared at Robin's back. She'd figured it out, too? Could she have heard something, seen something...?

Robin glanced over her shoulder and smiled. "I haven't been eavesdropping, if that's what you think."

"Then how...?" Zoro began, and then kicked himself mentally, realizing he'd as good as admitted there was something going on.

"I've suspected for quite some time," Robin said. "The way you look at him, the way you've always looked at him ... it says a lot."

Zoro frowned. He didn't want to believe he was that transparent.

"But these past few days ... did something happen?" Robin asked.

"You could say that," Zoro replied tightly.

"If you want to talk about it..." Robin left the offer dangling.

For a long time, Zoro was silent. It wasn't until Robin finished watering the last of the flowers that he sat up and looked squarely at her.

"I told him how I felt about him after we left Thriller Bark. He rejected me. A few days ago I told him I still feel the same. He rejected me. But that same night he came up to me and told me to kiss him."

Robin raised her eyebrows. "More than a little contradictory."

"I'll say." For a moment, Zoro hesitated. Then he decided that as long as he was spilling his guts he might as well tell her the rest. "But I kissed him anyway and ... well, it didn't stop there. And now he won't even look at me. If I seem agitated, it's probably because I am." He laughed humourlessly. "He said kissing me might help him figure out what he's feeling. Guess not." Even as he spoke Zoro could hear how childishly bitter he sounded.

Luckily, Robin didn't seem to mind. "Perhaps he needs time to process."

"He could say so."

"He may be worried about your reaction."

"Never worried about it before."

"True, but things have clearly changed between the two of you."

To that Zoro had no reply. She was right. Obviously.

Robin put away the watering can she was still holding. "He's not punishing you, you know."

"Sure feels like it." It was as though the cook was keeping his mouth shut and his eyes averted just to make Zoro suffer.

"Don't you think Sanji would come up with a rather more direct way to punish you if that was what he wanted?" Robin asked gently.

Zoro considered this for a moment. "Well, I guess he hasn't tried to kick my face in or cut off my access to the booze. Not yet anyway."

Robin laughed. "Very true!”

Closing his eye and lying back down Zoro said, "So you're telling me to be patient."

"I'm suggesting it," Robin corrected. "I'm telling you not to be so hard on yourself." She paused. "Of course, you could confront him. It's up to you." She smiled and headed down the stairs.

_Confront him_ , Zoro thought.  _Yeah right. He'd just get even more freaked out._

Still, he wasn't sure he could be patient much longer. The silence made him wonder, made him try to think of every possible thing the cook might be thinking. But trying to figure out what went on in that idiot's head wasn't the worst of it. No, the worst was the tiny sliver of hope that Robin had just made a little bigger. The silence provided that miniscule chance that Sanji wanted him after all. Silence wasn't rejection. In his head, Zoro realized the improbability. But since when did the heart pay attention to the head?

* * *

Sanji was tired. Almost too tired to function. Part of him wished he had stayed on the ship to get some rest, but there were ingredients to be bought and besides, he knew no matter when or where he tried to sleep that damn dream wouldn’t let him get any proper shut-eye. It had been nearly a week since he and Zoro had kissed and Sanji was still confused. In fact, he was more confused now than ever before. On top of that, he was still haunted by the dream and everything that had happened at Thriller Bark. It had all been weighing on his mind so heavily, adding to the muddled mess of his thoughts, stealing his concentration more often than he wanted to admit. He remembered the panic in his chest when he'd heard Zoro and Kuma's exchange, remembered how difficult it had been to hold it inside as he tried to convince the Shichibukai to take his life instead. He remembered waking up even more panicked, racing around searching for the swordsman, the wave of relief that had washed over him when he found him standing. And he remembered with stark clarity the pure, unbridled terror that had sliced through him when he noticed the blood staining the rubble all around Zoro, the rivulets of blood still running over his skin, coming seemingly from everywhere and nowhere, clouding his eyes and staining what was left of his shirt. And then, after days of fear, it had happened…

_"It's not about Kuma. It's something else entirely." Zoro paused, almost daring Sanji to turn away. When he didn't, Zoro continued, "I care about you. A lot. I have for a long time."_

_Sanji blinked and set down the knife in his hand. "Wh-What the hell are you saying?"_

_"Are you deaf?" Zoro asked wryly._

_"You're joking, right?"_

_"No. I decided it was time to let you know."_

_"Time to let me know?" Sanji repeated incredulously. "Why?! You expect me to just be okay with that?! Jeez, just stay the hell away from me. Or, I mean, it's probably just frustration anyway! We've been sailing for a long time, maybe at the next island you can find a girl – o-or a guy or whatever and –"_

_"Shut up," Zoro said. Still looking him in the eye, the swordsman stated, "There's no one I want but you."_

_"Well, we can't always have what we want!" Sanji exclaimed._

_Zoro smiled painfully. "I know."_

_And he walked away._

* * *

“Oi, Sanji, what’s the matter with you?”

Sanji snapped out of his memories and found himself face-to-face with Usopp. “Weren’t you helping Franky…?”

“We already finished loading the cola. What’s with you? I thought you’d beat us back to the ship,” the sniper said.

“Nothing is with me,” Sanji replied tightly.

“Bullshit,” said Usopp. “I’ve never seen you walk around a market looking depressed. Not to mention how weird you and Zoro have been acting….”

“Don’t lump me in with that dumbass.”

“Oh, come on. You guys haven’t fought for days!”

“So what?” Sanji snarled, shouldering past the long-nosed man.

“That’s like a storm on the Calm Belt!” Usopp exclaimed, half-jogging to keep up with the cook. “Robin said even your zombies fought on Thriller –”

“Shut up!” Sanji cut him off, bristling and glaring at him. “Don’t talk to me about that shit!”

“Sanji…”

“A-And I don’t want anything to do with that shitty swordsman, got it?!”

“Okay, okay, fine,” Usopp said, but he had heard the waver in Sanji’s voice. For a while, they walked in silence. Then, adopting a gentle, careful tone, Usopp said, “If you wanna talk about anything, I’m here. You know you can trust me, right?”

After a tense moment, Sanji sighed heavily. “Yeah, I know. Sorry.”

“Need some help carrying supplies?” Usopp offered.

“Sure, why not.”

* * *

 It was the blanket that bothered Zoro. The blanket and the jacket. The cook knew Zoro didn't need them, yet he'd taken the time to find him the blanket and make him a pillow. Why? That was something you did for someone you cared for, not someone you were going to ignore for who-knows-how-long. It was a sweet, even loving gesture. Maybe the cook meant it as an apology. 'Sorry, made a mistake, my bad.' No, that was stupid. The cook had no qualms about potentially hurting Zoro's feelings. Zoro hoped Robin was right about him just needing time. Still, he found himself thinking that as soon as that curly-browed idiot returned to the ship he'd get him alone, corner him if he had to, and demand to know what the hell he was thinking.

_Don't be stupid,_ he chided himself. _Usopp said he was gonna go look for the idiot, they'll probably show up together, and besides, cornering him would be beyond stupid. Robin's right, he probably just needs time. I can wait._

Yet soon he found himself rising to glance over the side of the ship, checking to see if the blond and the long-nose were coming every few minutes. He wasn’t entirely sure why – because he wanted to make sure he was hidden somewhere by the time they got to the ship, or so that he knew when to move in for the confrontation. Neither option was one Zoro wanted to entertain. It didn’t take long for him to grow tired of feeling antsy, and at last he decided to go for a walk. While Franky and Brook had both returned to the ship, the others were still exploring the island, an autumn island by the fiery look of its forest. Maybe he’d run into Luffy or Chopper. Either way, he suddenly simply had to get off the ship, clear his head. He gave a shout-out to Franky, the only other person out on the deck, and went on his way.

* * *

It was nearing midday when Sanji and Usopp returned to the Sunny, laden with food and ingredients. They greeted Franky and headed into the pantry, and though Sanji said he didn’t need help putting everything away, Usopp hung behind, trying to decide whether or not to attempt talking to the cook again. Sanji seemed to have sensed something, because he heaved a sigh.

“I’ll get go –”

“Listen,” the cook interrupted. “Something did happen between me and Zoro, and I don’t really know how I feel about it. But … it was kind of a big deal and I started it, and now I don’t know if I made a good decision or the biggest mistake of my life and … shit, there’s so much more to it, though, than just that one thing, and –”

“Whoa, whoa, hang on, I’m not sure I follow. Can’t you just tell me what happened?” asked Usopp.

Sanji shook his head. “I need to figure this whole thing out first.”

Sighing, Usopp said, “Well, I don’t think ignoring the problem is gonna make it go away. Why don’t you just talk to him?”

“Wow, why didn’t I think of that?” Sanji said sarcastically. “Shit, if it was that easy I wouldn’t have this problem.”

“I have a point, though.”

“How can I talk to him when I don’t know what to think about this whole thing?”

“What if talking to him will help sort it out, whatever it is?”

Sanji made an annoyed noise, but said nothing. Usopp, leaning against the wall, watched the other man’s back as he sorted cans and jars onto shelves. He could see the irritation running through the blond. It was in his posture, in his movements, even in the way he blew smoke out of the corner of his mouth. Whatever had happened between him and the swordsman seemed to have been more than ‘kind of’ a big deal.

“The only other option I can think of is to tell me what happened,” Usopp said at last. “Then I could try to help you figure things out. But if you wanna keep it a secret, I can’t say much.”

Through gritted teeth Sanji said, “It’s not up for discussion.”

“Then you should probably talk to Zoro.”

“I’ll consider it.”

 

 


	4. A Different Kind of Silence

Zoro wasn’t lost. Sure, he had no idea where the Sunny was, but he hadn’t been on his way back to the ship anyway. He was just wandering this tiny autumn island, and how could you be lost if you had no particular destination in mind? Still, it was a bit strange that he hadn’t seen any people for a while now. Maybe they were all headed to the festival that the old man who had given Zoro the mug of cider he was currently sipping at had mentioned. Zoro was certain that the crew would be attending, as well. The event sounded like one big party the way the old man described it, and Zoro knew the words ‘free food’ would be music to more than one of his _nakama’s_ ears. Yes, he was sure to find them there, and he was sure to wind up ‘there’ if he just kept walking – the island was that small.

Walking along the well-worn dirt road past fields and orchards, barns and farmhouses, Zoro found himself quite suddenly swallowed up by the forest that had given the island the appearance of being on fire when it had appeared on the horizon before their ship. The road carried him a ways into the trees but soon tapered off into a winding footpath. Wholly unconcerned, Zoro continued down it, and soon found himself encased in a silence not entirely unlike the one he sometimes experienced in the midst of battle, when all the world seemed to fade away but him and his blades and their foe. Yet the forest had a life and sound all its own, and remaining somewhat guarded, as any pirate worth half his bounty should, Zoro cast about with his Observation Haki and caught many things others might not – the fox lurking in the underbrush, disturbed from its nap; the squirrel at the root of a nearby pine, burying an acorn; the woodpecker, not packing at the tree to which it clung, but listening intently while Zoro passed below.

When Zoro came to a quietly burbling stream some time later, he still hadn’t detected the slightest hint of a human presence – not that he had expected he would. The sun’s golden rays cut through the fiery canopy at an angle that told him evening was fast approaching. He wasn’t particularly tired, but decided to rest for a moment anyway. Seated on a mossy boulder next to the stream, Zoro breathed in the late autumn smells of the forest while savouring the last drops of his cider. He sat for a while longer after finishing the drink, enjoying the forest’s not-quite-silence, so different from the silence he had been enduring on the Sunny.

When that thought hit him, he stood up abruptly, washed out the mug in the stream, and crossed the water with the help of some large stones. The footpath picked up again on the opposite bank, and Zoro followed it, letting the forest carry his senses and his thoughts away from everything pre-occupying him – away from the damn cook, away from his soft lips and firm body and gentle hands, away from the ship, away from his conversation with Robin…. He breathed deep and slow, and had managed to calm himself quite thoroughly when suddenly –

“HIYAA!”

Zoro stopped the wooden sword with one hand and held firm even as the kid wielding it tried to wrestle it away from him.

“Give! It! Back!” he exclaimed, stomping his feet.

Zoro didn’t let go. “What are you doing out here?”

“What are _you_ doing out here?” he countered. “This is _our_ land!”

“Oh. Sorry.” Zoro released the wooden sword and the kid, who had been in mid-tug, fell backwards with his own momentum.

“Oww,” he groaned. He scrambled up and held the sword in front of him, both hands on the hilt. “‘Sorry’? What kind of pirate apologizes for trespassing? Shouldn’t you be robbing the town with your crew?”

“How do you know I’m a pirate?”

“I saw your flag, duh!”

“We’re not here to start trouble.”

“A likely story!”

“Whether you believe me or not is up to you.” Zoro turned and continued along the footpath.

“Wait! Where do you think you’re going?” The kid sprinted after him.

“On a walk. Away from your land.”

“You’re walking further into our land, idiot!”

Zoro stopped, and the kid ran into him. “How does a kid like you have land anyway? What are you, eight?”

“I’m ten! And it’s not just _my_ land, my mom lives here, too!” The kid gasped. “Oh, I see what you’re doing! Playing nice so I’ll give you information… Well, it won’t work again!”

Zoro sighed. “Go home,” he said flatly. “Your mom’s probably worried.”

The kid scowled and swung his sword again, and again Zoro caught it and held tight. The kid swore in frustration, much to Zoro’s amusement, and snarled, “You’re a swordsman, aren’t you?! Fight me!”

“I’m not fighting a kid. Especially not a kid without a proper weapon.”

“Stop being so nice!”

“I’m not being nice, I’m being fair.” Zoro let go of the sword.

This time, the kid stayed on his feet. “Same thing. Pirates aren’t supposed to be _fair_ , they’re just a bunch of cheats and thieves!”

Briefly, Zoro wondered what had happened to the kid to make him hate pirates so much. He reminded him of Nami when they’d first met, though Nami would never have been so foolish as to charge an armed pirate alone in the woods. The moment of curiosity passed, and Zoro started walking once more. It was nearly dusk now. The festival would be starting soon, and he was thirsty for more of that cider. It hadn’t been overly sweet, but nice and dry, just how he liked it, and he had an inkling that there would be plenty more booze to sample.

“Wait!” the kid yelled, running after him yet again.

“Isn’t it almost your bedtime? Go home already, kid.”

“Stop making fun of me! Oi, where are you going?!”

“There’s a festival tonight, right? I’m going to meet my crew there. Besides, I have to return this.” He held up the mug still in his hand.

The kid stopped running, and for a moment, Zoro thought he’d finally given up. Then he shouted, “You’re going the wrong way!”

Zoro paused. “I’ll find it eventually.”

The kid heaved a loud, drawn-out sigh and said, “The path ends pretty soon. You’ll get lost, or should I say, even more lost. No outsider can find their way around these woods.”

Zoro bristled. This kid hadn’t even been able to land a hit on him, couldn’t even wrestle his damn sword away from him, and now he was acting better than him? At the same time, he didn’t really want to wander around the forest all night – he wanted to go to the festival. It would be the perfect way to relax… and getting stuck in the forest would be a perfect way to be consumed by those thoughts he was still trying to avoid.

“Then point the way and I’ll leave you alone,” he said, his tone measured.

The kid heaved another sigh and said, “I’ll lead the way. But I’m warning you! Try anything funny and I’ll take you straight to the sheriff!”

“Whatever you say, kid.”

“It’s not _kid_. It’s Max.”

“Whatever you say, kid.”

* * *

“This island is having a festival tonight,” Nami announced as she entered the galley in the late afternoon. “There’s going to be a bonfire and all kinds of free food and drink.”

“That sounds wonderful, Nami-san,” Sanji said distractedly. It had been too early to start dinner, so he was making fruity drinks for the crew hanging around the ship. His heart wasn’t really in it, but he needed to be _doing_ something.

Nami made a face. “I thought you’d be more excited. I bet there’ll be all kinds of interesting dishes.”

Forcing a smile, Sanji said, “You’re right, it’s a great opportunity, assuming Luffy doesn’t eat everything before I can get to it.”

Nami studied him for a moment before laughing a little and sliding into a seat at the breakfast bar. “Good point. These villagers made a _huge_ mistake letting Luffy hear the words ‘all-you-can-eat free food’.”

“Definitely.” With a flourish, Sanji served the drink he’d been working on to Nami, who sipped it through its pink straw and said, “Mmm, delicious!” Then she fixed her gaze squarely on him and asked, “Is everything okay with you?”

Sanji supressed a groan. First Usopp, now Nami-san? At this rate even Luffy would be pestering him before long, and not everyone would be as subtle as the sniper and the navigator. An image of Luffy calling him and Zoro out at dinner and demanding to know why they were being so weird flashed through Sanji’s mind. How would Zoro react if that happened? Sanji could almost hear him saying, “Curly-brow over there made out with me and now he’s avoiding me.” He could see realization dawning on Usopp’s face, followed by discomfort, could hear Nami-san and Robin-chan giggle, could imagine Brook _yohohoho_ -ing awkwardly, Franky trying to smile but not quite pulling it off, Chopper looking confused. Then Luffy would start questioning him and –

“Sanji-kun?”

“I’m fine,” he lied almost automatically. “Don’t worry about me, Nami-san, I’m fine.”

But Nami wasn’t having any of it. “Cut the crap, Sanji-kun, there’s obviously something bothering you! And do you think I haven’t noticed that Zoro’s been acting strange, too? What the hell happened between you two?”

“I … I …” he stuttered feebly. He couldn’t lie to Nami-san, not about this, but he couldn’t tell her the truth either, not even the little he’d told Usopp. She’d figure him out in a heartbeat. “It’s just … I mean … I …”

Her expression softened a bit. “I never thought I’d be complaining that you two _stopped_ fighting, but… I’m worried. We all are.” She stirred her drink and let her gaze drop. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, but you have to know the two of you can’t go on like this. Whatever happened … you guys have to sort it out.” She looked up sharply and adopted a harsh tone once again when she added, “But if you’re gonna fight it out, you better do it _away_ from the ship. I’m not covering repair costs just ‘cause you two are too dense to talk about things!”

Sanji laughed, and it sounded almost natural. “As you wish, Nami-san.”

She had a little more of her drink. “I wonder where that idiot is…”

Sanji turned away and started working on another drink. He didn’t want to talk about the moss-head anymore.

“Well, whatever. It’s a small island. He’ll find his way eventually.”

For a while, they remained in comfortable silence, and Sanji found himself starting to relax. It must have been Nami-san’s presence, her calming influence. As Sanji made three more drinks, Nami started telling him about the things she had seen and heard in town. The island was called Syksy, and the festival taking place that night was the annual harvest festival, where all the local farmers, bakers, cooks, and brewers came together to provide an epic feast for the whole island. There would be musicians and other entertainers, as well as other artisans displaying and selling their products. The bonfire would be lit at sunset, and would burn all night. The more she told him, the more Sanji started looking forward to it – it really did sound like a wonderful opportunity. By the time he put the finishing touches on the final drink, he had all but forgotten the shitty swordsman, and had started wondering what kinds of special dishes would be at the festival. He was even able to smile to Nami-san as he stepped out of the galley to serve Robin-chan her drink and tell Usopp and Brook where they could find theirs (and the usual bottle of cola for Franky). He returned to the galley to clean up and continued conversing with Nami until dusk began creeping in and Usopp shouted, “Nami! Sanji! The festival’s starting soon! You coming?”

He bowed Nami-san out of the galley, smiling for real now, and together with the other four crew members who had been on the ship, they headed towards the town.


End file.
